AAA #36

Designed by: Tan Zhi Shan (23-I1)

Q1: School sucks. Every day feels like pain. My eye is damn itchy and I’m trying to yolo but it’s not working out. Send thoughts and prayers.

Hi! We are so sorry you feel this way and we empathise with you. However, fret not, there are many people who feel the same way and understand your circumstances. While it may be hard to cope with all the stresses and this difficult period in life, we are here to hear you out and offer some friendly advice from one Eunoian to another!

Much like the other Eunoians who come to us with their worries, sometimes all you need is for someone to actively listen to you. Perhaps finding a comfortable space to share your feelings with someone you trust could help. Knowing someone is there for you at all times, in thought and prayer - especially in school, can make this arduous journey seem less daunting!

A quote we fondly remember reminds us that “Grey skies are just clouds passing”. Likewise, tough times are only temporary. Things will improve. Hanging in there and finding a silver lining - positive aspects in times of trial - will help you keep in touch with yourself. Look forward to the holidays, the friendships and fun you have in school. If school isn’t a happy place for you, look towards a brighter future, where you, once you have put in your best effort and obtained a good grade, can be freed from the pain you feel day to day in school. Hang in there buddy! These times will pass.

On the other hand, if your feelings of pain and distress persist to levels you feel are unbearable, seeking professional help might not be a bad idea. Seeking help isn’t a sign of weakness, but a sign that you are willing to acknowledge your flaws and work on them! Mental health professionals are trained to provide you with the necessary support and might offer better, more tailored advice than what we can offer. These trusted adults may even be a preferred option over friends, offering a more objective point of view, a good option to explore!

Finding coping strategies such as taking an hour off each day to pursue individual hobbies or ways to detach from work can also help relieve stress. This can come in the forms of engaging in exercise, spending time with loved ones, or practising mindfulness techniques, journalling, going for a walk, meditating. These activities can help you mentally rest and break away from the mundane routine of work on work on work. Most of the time, we as people just need a short break and recharge before getting back into the hustle and bustle of life. Give it a try!

Being patient is an important trait that not everyone possesses, but would benefit us greatly if we did. Remember that learning is a journey, and that just because we study hard for a while does not mean our grades will have drastic improvements immediately. Through consistent effort and believing in yourself, you will get there eventually! But do avoid comparing yourself to other people in this journey, as that will only make you feel demoralised. Instead, focus on yourself and just be patient.

When it comes to taking care of ourselves, many people tend to neglect their mental and physical health in order to push themselves harder to achieve greater things. While we can’t reshape this purgatory world we live in, the best we can do is to give more thought to our own well-being. By making sure to have healthy meals and drinking more water, as well as prioritising rest instead of attempting to complete tutorials while bleary eyed at 3am, we can reduce damage to our physical health. 

Additionally, having a friend to check up on, and who checks up on you, can help the both of you greatly. By studying together or perhaps just meeting up to talk about life every once in a while, you can make sure that the both of you are doing well emotionally. During these trying times, it is important to stay connected with the people around you, and this extends to your family as well!

However, if you notice a certain friend or classmate  acting differently than they normally do, such as isolating themselves, or starting to sleep a lot in class even though it was a rare occurrence for them previously, perhaps it would be beneficial to reach out to them as well. Checking up on them to show that you care and are available to talk if they need someone to lean on could be that bit of support that they require. On the other hand, if they do not want to talk or open up, respect their boundaries, but let them know you are there whenever they're ready.

If you are concerned for someone’s safety or well-being, do not hesitate to encourage them to seek professional help, or reach out to someone who can provide immediate support, such as a counsellor, therapist, doctor, or a trusted person in their life. Best of luck and we send our best thoughts and prayers!

Q2: How do I study for Chem, especially if I have a weak foundation…

Thank you for sharing your concerns with us and we want you to know that you are not alone on this daunting journey! Believe in yourself, even if you have a weak foundation right now, you will still see progress eventually if you put in consistent effort.

First things first, don’t put yourself down with negativity. Working to bolster your weaknesses is so much more important. If you let your weaknesses haunt you, it will leave you incapacitated and unmotivated to work. So, try starting afresh and even though it may take a long time before you get there, remember that it’s the process that matters the most. Always remember, it’s never too late to improve unless you have already given up!

Now that we have put aside our negativity, let’s look at some study methods which may help you!

Firstly, we have the Pomodoro Technique. The Pomodoro Technique is a time management method based on 25-minute sessions of focused work followed by five-minute breaks, repeated in a cycle. Longer breaks of 15 to 30 minutes are usually taken after four consecutive work intervals. The Pomodoro Technique is highly effective as it will improve your concentration, and help you focus for longer periods leading to more productivity. For Chemistry, the content is very heavy and can be very taxing to digest. Therefore, applying this technique may help with overcoming the unattainable feeling that inundates us, when we are faced with abstruse topics.

Now, this technique may not be for all, as it may be hard to schedule fixed productivity, as that is just not human nature. One of our personal favourite tips for studying is to apply active learning. Instead of passively trying to retain information, start questioning everything you see, and find answers to those questions yourself! Make an effort to try to summarise what you have learnt during those long and convoluted lectures, to make meaningful connections between what you already know and what you are learning. If you are a note taker, try understanding and simplifying ideas for your own understanding instead of aggressively copying down notes, which you have yet to actively understand. The multidisciplinary nature of Chemistry requires us to draw connections and build a good foundation! Start conversations with your friends on the subject and discuss unfamiliar topics, as this may help to clarify doubts and allow you to properly rehash ideas to explain to your friends. Active application will help you draw the connections which would ultimately be beneficial in your examinations!

Next on the list: past year papers! Do not be daunted or discouraged by complex and lengthy papers. They are your best friends when it comes to studying as they allow you to practise applying your knowledge and your phrasing of key ideas. What many grapple with is how they should phrase ideas, and this causes them to feel poorly equipped. Through the answer scheme provided in test papers, you can look out for keywords which you must remember. To take it up a notch, try observing common questions and patterns in topics, as this will allow you to better prepare in a short span of time, for more important topics. All topics are important, but some such as chemical bonding play a foundational role in the subject. Analysing past year papers can help you observe the connections between topics, and key ideas which need to be understood. Working on these papers can also help you quickly assess your weaknesses which you can then target more effectively!

Finally, your tutors are always there to help you! Don’t be afraid to approach them for consultations as they are more than willing to help you. Consulting them would give you the opportunity to clarify your understanding of fundamental concepts which you struggle to understand. After all, they have so much experience in teaching that they will be able to pinpoint your gaps in knowledge and clear any misconceptions you may have. Furthermore, they can give you immediate answers to questions you may have after attempting all the discussions and test papers yourself, and answer any burning questions. Working to rectify these problems will prevent you from taking unnecessary detours, so that you can conserve your energy to focus more on studying!

To finish off, remember to take care of yourself in this process, and take breaks when you need to. Listen to your body as it knows when it needs to take time off. Furthermore, breaks are not as unproductive as they seem. In fact, they allow you to consolidate your learning, and contribute to long term retention of information. However, do note that breaks should not over stimulate your brain, as this will only have counterproductive effects. Try meditation, or just staring out into the beautiful world we live in! Only by recharging yourself, can you replenish your energy to complete this long marathon! We are not robots, and we are not programmed to have fixed productivity, so don’t blame yourself when you are not having a productive day. Try less taxing tasks on those days and when you get into a day which you feel the swing of productivity, ride on and work as much as you like! Learning is a long journey, but believe in yourself, take baby steps and work towards healthy habits, and you will slowly see progression in your learning. Eventually, you will be able to reach your full potential! All the best for Chemistry and trust the seemingly daunting process. We’ll all be here supporting you! Fighting!

Q3: The girl I like probably does not like me. What should I do?

We would like to extend our heartfelt appreciation to you for reaching out to us during this potentially challenging moment in your life. The intricacies of emotions and human connections can often be complex to navigate. The choice between persevering in your pursuit of this particular relationship or letting go of your affections is a deeply personal one. Nevertheless, we would like to offer you some considerations that may guide your decision-making process.

First, prioritise your health and well-being.Should you find that your feelings for this person are beginning to weigh heavily on your emotional well-being and self-esteem, it might be necessary to consider what you would like to do moving forward. Constantly sustaining an unrequited affection is emotionally draining, as it leads you to grasp onto faint, deceptive glimmers of hope. Recognising when to take a step back and concentrate on your own personal growth and happiness, and/or broadening your social horizons, is essential to your own needs and interests. You are bound to encounter individuals in the world who may be better suited for you and reciprocate your feelings. Don’t let your interest in this person stop you from forming meaningful relationships with others.

Second, reflect on the origin of your feelings. It is essential to reflect on why you developed feelings for this person in the first place. Was it due to societal pressure or the allure of being in a relationship? It's crucial to acknowledge the pressures you may have succumbed to and remember that relationships should not be rushed. Everyone has their unique pace for finding love, and it's entirely normal to take your time. Alternatively, your feelings may have originated from a genuine connection with this person. In such a case, it's essential to re-evaluate the reasons that initially drew you to them and determine whether these factors still hold significance for you, justifying your attachment.

Third, respect the other party's boundaries.Respecting the boundaries and preferences of the person you're interested in is paramount. If you sense discomfort or disinterest from their side as you pursue this relationship, it's imperative to honour their choices and refrain from pushing interactions. People possess diverse moral and value systems that shape their boundaries and desires. Empathise with their perspective and exercise restraint when necessary. If you've harboured these feelings for an extended period of time, gradually distancing yourself and redirecting your focus toward friendships, studies, or hobbies can be a constructive approach to take. Be compassionate with yourself; the journey of letting go may not be easy.

Fourth, open and honest communication. If you've been engaged in a perpetual cycle of speculation regarding their feelings, it may be time for candid communication. Express your emotions sincerely to the other person. While it demands courage, this direct approach will provide clarity. If they reciprocate your feelings, it's a cause for celebration. However, if they do not, it serves as a definitive signal to move on.

Fifth, assess the depth of your relationship to the other party. The degree of closeness you share with this individual should influence your decision-making.

If this person is a close friend of yours, or someone that you have to continue interacting with on a regular basis, it is necessary to consider the implications of continuing to pursue your interest in the person. If you are not getting any indication of the other party showing interest in you, if you believe it may disrupt the current friendship you have with them, and if you can see yourself being content with keeping things as they are, you may want to let go of your feelings. However, if this person truly matters to you greatly, and your connection to them goes beyond usual infatuation, then perhaps you should consider continuing to work on this relationship with them.

If you are not close to the person, expanding your social circle can be an effective strategy to move on. Strong friendships can be equally as fulfilling as romantic relationships. The deeper your friendships are, the more content you may feel. This might facilitate the process of moving on from infatuation. Remember, it's entirely natural to develop feelings and not swiftly recover from them. However, it's essential to prevent becoming excessively obsessed with one individual. There are countless wonderful people who might be more compatible with you. Additionally, this could be an opportunity to reassess your personal priorities and preferences in a relationship, allowing you to gain a deeper understanding of yourself and your desires.

Navigating the complexities of life during this phase can be challenging. Balancing academic demands, extracurricular commitments, and personal relationships can be rather perplexing. Still, we encourage you to prioritise your well-being and happiness. Through this process, you may discover fresh perspectives on love and life that will guide you forward in overcoming this particular hurdle. All experiences happen for a reason, even if you may not quite understand why at the moment. Perhaps one day you will look back at this period of your life and find that it has shaped you in meaningful ways that you could not have foreseen.

If there is something on your mind that has been troubling you these days, feel free to send in your worries here! All submissions are anonymous.